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'The lack of information around how ADHD and autism shows up in adults means that many of us have been assuming we were anxious, not working hard enough, or just entirely failing altogether.' – Jess Joy and Charlotte Mia Written by two late-diagnosed neurodivergent women and the founders of fast-growing online community @IAmPayingAttention, HOW NOT TO FIT IN is an handbook-meets-rallying cry. Foregrounding real experiences with autism and ADHD, this book explores the journey of discovering, accepting and flourishing with your neurodivergent brain. It explores why getting diagnosis can be so fraught and gendered, and how to navigate a world which centres neurotypical brains in the realms of relationships, careers, friendships and finances. By reading this book, you'll: Start to understand why so many people are being diagnosed with ADHD and autism right now Learn the impact that not knowing your own brain can have on your mental health Find the confidence to ask for accommodations and adjustments at work – without apologising Have the chance to note down how this journey is evolving for you in chapter-by-chapter workbook sections. ... and, most importantly, get to know yourself and your needs better.Featuring the latest research and thinking on neurodivergence, contributions from dozens of experts and the real stories of people just like you, this innovative book – which has been written and designed especially for *spicy* brains – is essential reading for anyone whose brain seems to see the world in a different way.
This program features an introduction and conclusion read by the author. Blending cutting-edge research with engaging storytelling, The Breakthrough Years offers readers a paradigm-shifting comprehensive understanding of adolescence. "Just wait until they're a teenager!" Many parents of newborns have heard this warning about the stressful phase that's to come. But what if it doesn't have to be that way? Child development expert Ellen Galinsky challenges widely held assumptions about adolescents and offers new ways for parents and others to better understand and interact with them in a way that helps them thrive. By combining the latest research on cognitive neuroscience with an unprecedented and extensive set of studies of young people nine through nineteen and their families, Galinsky reveals, among other things, that adolescents don't want to separate completely from their parents but seek a different type of relationship; that they want to be helpers rather than be helped; and that social media can become a positive influence for teens. Galinsky's Shared Solutions framework and Possibilities Mindset show you how to turn daily conflicts into opportunities for problem-solving where both teens and parents feel listened to and respected; how to encourage positive risk-taking in your child like standing up for themselves, making new friends, and helping their communities; and how to promote five essential executive function–based skills that can help them succeed now and in the future. The Breakthrough Years recasts adolescence as a time of possibility for teens and adults, offering breakthrough opportunities for connection. A Macmillan Audio production from Flatiron Books.
Children of Coercive Control extends Evan Stark's path-breaking analysis of interpersonal violence to children, showing that coercive control is the most important cause and context of child abuse and child homicide outside a war zone, as well as of the sexual abuse, denigration, exploitation, isolation, and subordination of children. The book provides a working model of the coercive control of children and illustrates its dynamics and consequences with dramatic cases drawn from the headlines and Dr. Stark's forensic practice. The cases include those in which the coercive control of children runs in tandem with the coercive control of women, where children are "weaponized" in the coercive control of their mother and cases where abused mothers harm their children to survive or protect them from worse. By highlighting a criminal cause of child maltreatment and a plausible justice response, Evan Stark challenges the common assumptions that child abuse and neglect fall on a continuum of problems rooted in maternal deficits, immaturity, poverty, and environmental stressors as well as the combination of Child Welfare and Child Protection Services that currently provide the ameliorative response.
When your parents are pathologically self-centered, manipulative, or emotionally abusive, the pain they cause is deep and often difficult to put into words. You may experience anxiety, depression, complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD), low self-esteem, addiction, or other mental health conditions as an adult. But it was not your fault, and there are tools you can use to heal the trauma caused by your childhood. This compassionate guide will help you gain a greater understanding of what happened in your past; transform deep pain into emotional resilience; and build the loving, meaningful relationship with yourself that you deserve. You'll also learn to set boundaries with others, assert your needs, and overcome emotional avoidance to develop warm, loving relationships with others. Author Sherrie Campbell offers powerful skills drawn from a range of evidence-based treatments, including mindfulness, acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), self-compassion, lived experience, and body-based practices to help you heal from the past and reconnect with your authentic self. Let this book guide you on the path to healing, wholeness, and self-discovery.
We all want to avoid drama and pain in our relationships, yet we remain stuck in never-ending cycles of misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and triggering interactions. Sometimes it just seems easier to decide we are "done" with people rather than continue trying over and over again. Even our best and closest relationships-with our partners, friends, family, and colleagues-can feel unduly challenging. In this straightforward guide, expert relationship therapists Edrica Richardson and Ilene Cohen get to the heart of what it means to really be in fulfilling relationships and why connecting with the ones you love can feel so hard. You'll learn how "doing the work" encourages healing and growth within yourself and within your relationships. Creating and maintaining strong, fulfilling relationships doesn't mean disregarding your own boundaries or letting go of what you want for the sake of "keeping the peace" in your home, family, friend group, or workplace. Instead, it means being more yourself! By moving into the fullness of who you are, you can claim freedom and agency in your own life, learn how to release blame, and cultivate happier and healthier relationships with those you love.
Joining the ranks of Evicted and The New Jim Crow, a former caseworker's searing, clear-eyed investigation of the child welfare system—from foster care to incarceration—that exposes the deep-rooted biases shaping the system, witnessed through the lives of several Black families. Dr. Jessica Pryce knows the child welfare system firsthand and, in this long overdue book, breaks it down from the inside out, sharing her professional journey and offering the crucial perspectives of caseworkers and Black women impacted by the system. It is a groundbreaking and eye-opening confrontation of the inherent and systemic racism deeply entrenched within the child welfare system. Pryce started her social work career with an internship where she was committed to helping keep children safe. In the book, she walks alongside her close friends and even her family as they navigate the system, while sharing her own reckoning with the requirements of her job and her role in the systemic harm. Through poignant narratives and introspection, readers witness the harrowing effects of a well-intentioned workforce that has lost its way, demonstrating how separations are often not in a child's best interests. With a renewed commitment to strengthening families in her role as activist, Pryce invites the child welfare workforce to embark on a journey of self-reflection and radical growth. At once a framework for transforming child protective services and an intimate, stunning first-hand account of the system as it currently operates, Broken takes everyday scenarios as its focus rather than extreme child welfare cases, challenging readers to critically examine their own mindsets and biases in order to reimagine how we help families in need. Supplemental enhancement PDF accompanies the audiobook.
For those who care for chronically ill children, a new understanding of hope that equips adults to better nurture pediatric hope among sick kids—articulated by the children themselves As anyone with a chronic illness knows, hope can sometimes be hard to come by. For parents and caregivers of children with serious illness, there can be a real struggle to move beyond one's own grief, fear, and suffering to see what hope means for these kids. Duane Bidwell, a scholar, minister, and former hospital chaplain who has struggled with serious illness himself, spent time with 48 chronically ill children in dialysis units and transplant clinics around the United States. Chronically ill kids, he found, don’t adhere to popular or scholarly understandings of hope. They experience hope as a sense of well-being in the present, not a promise of future improvement, an ability to set goals, or the absence of illness and suffering. With this mindset, these kids suggest a new understanding of pediatric hope, saying hope becomes concrete when they realize community, claim power, attend to Spirit, choose trust, and maintain identity. Offering textured portraits of children with end-stage kidney disease, After the Worst Day Ever illustrates in their words how sick children experience, maintain, and turn toward hope even when illness cannot be cured and severely limits quality of life. Their insights reveal how the adults in a sick child’s world—parents, chaplains, medical professionals, teachers, and others—can nurture hope. They also shift our understanding of hope from an internal resource located “inside” an individual to a shared, communal experience that becomes a resource for individuals. Rich and moving, Bidwell’s work helps us imagine anew what it means to sustain hope despite inescapable suffering and the limits of chronic illness.
A new, hopeful pathway to understanding children’s trauma and providing effective interventions to build healthier communities Each year at least a billion children around the world are victims of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) that range from physical abuse to racial discrimination to neglect and food deprivation. The brain plasticity of our most vulnerable makes the adverse effects of trauma only that much more damaging to mental and physical development. Those dealt a hand of ACEs are more likely to drop out of school, have a shorter life, abuse substances, and suffer from myriad mental health and behavioral issues. The crucial question is: How do we intervene to offer these children a more hopeful future? Neurobiologist and educator Dr. Marc Hauser provides a novel, research-based framework to understand a child’s unique response to ACEs that goes beyond our current understanding and is centered around the five Ts—the timing during development when the trauma began, its type, tenure , toxicity , and how much turbulence it has caused in a child’s life. Using this lens, adults can start to help children build resilience and recover—and even benefit—from their adversity through targeted community and school interventions, emotional regulation tools, as well as a new frontier of therapies focused on direct brain stimulation, including neurofeedback and psychedelics. While human suffering experienced by children is the most devastating, it also presents the most promise for recovery; the plasticity of young people’s brains makes them vulnerable, but it also makes them apt to take back the joy, wonder, innocence, and curiosity of childhood when given the right support. Vulnerable Minds is a call to action for parents, policymakers, educators, and doctors to reclaim what’s been lost and commit ourselves to our collective responsibility to all children. *Includes a downloadable PDF of charts and graphs from the book.
Tips, tools, advice, and activities for raising eco-friendly kids while nurturing compassion, resilience, and community engagement. Drawing from cutting-edge social-science research, parent interviews, and experiential wisdom, science writer and parenting blogger Shannon Brescher Shea shows how green living and great parenting go hand in hand to teach kids kindness, compassion, resilience, and grit—all while giving them the lifelong tools they need to be successful, engaged, and independent. Growing Sustainable Together is packed with easy tips, expert parenting advice, and practical hands-on activities for the toddler years up through the early teens. The enriching activities, resource guides, and recommended book lists in each chapter distill core sustainablility knowledge, like: Understanding energy efficiency and renewables Instilling anti-waste and anti-consumerist values Learning where our food comes from Developing a lifelong love for environmental activism, volunteering, and community engagement The book concludes with a practical appendix that gives talking points for engaging teachers, school systems, and fellow parents in eco-friendly activities.
A gentle and novel guide to new motherhood — one that encourages women to take time to breathe, embrace their experiences, and be "good enough"—one yoga minute at a time Yoga instructor Alison Rogers and coauthor Erin O. White forge a new path through contemporary motherhood with their collection of gentle suggestions for beginning and deepening a home yoga practice for new mothers. From the warm-up of first days with a newborn to the wobbly-but-standing postures of confident new motherhood, Breathing Space for New Mothers encourages women to notice and nurture their feelings and foster self-compassion to approach motherhood with curiosity instead of fear, improvisation instead of rigidity, and humor instead of worry. The authors offer mothers a singular message: your well-being matters as much as your baby’s. Each chapter ends with a one-minute mindful yoga practice, which can be done in a sequence to create a relaxing and balancing support for the incredibly demanding first nine months with a baby.
From New York Times bestselling coauthor of The Coddling of the American Mind , an essential investigation into the collapse of youth mental health—and a plan for a healthier, freer childhood After more than a decade of stability or improvement, the mental health of adolescents plunged in the early 2010s. Rates of depression, anxiety, self-harm, and suicide rose sharply, more than doubling on most measures. Why? In The Anxious Generation , social psychologist Jonathan Haidt lays out the facts about the epidemic of teen mental illness that hit many countries at the same time. He then investigates the nature of childhood, including why children need play and independent exploration to mature into competent, thriving adults. Haidt shows how the “play-based childhood” began to decline in the 1980s, and how it was finally wiped out by the arrival of the “phone-based childhood” in the early 2010s. He presents more than a dozen mechanisms by which this “great rewiring of childhood” has interfered with children’s social and neurological development, covering everything from sleep deprivation to attention fragmentation, addiction, loneliness, social contagion, social comparison, and perfectionism. He explains why social media damages girls more than boys and why boys have been withdrawing from the real world into the virtual world, with disastrous consequences for themselves, their families, and their societies. Most important, Haidt issues a clear call to action. He diagnoses the “collective action problems” that trap us, and then proposes four simple rules that might set us free. He describes steps that parents, teachers, schools, tech companies, and governments can take to end the epidemic of mental illness and restore a more humane childhood. Haidt has spent his career speaking truth backed by data in the most difficult landscapes—communities polarized by politics and religion, campuses battling culture wars, and now the public health emergency faced by Gen Z. We cannot afford to ignore his findings about protecting our children—and ourselves—from the psychological damage of a phone-based life. *Includes a downloadable PDF of charts, graphs, and images from the book.
An experiential guide to re-orienting our understanding of late adulthood as one of life's most meaningful and transformative stages Aging can bring new fears, challenges, and concerns. Loss of career, loved ones, or changing physical and cognitive abilities can leave us feeling isolated and scared. Sandi Peters shows us that growing older need not mean the end of personal growth. In fact, late adulthood can prove to be the most meaningful and transformative period of one's life. The key, says Peters, is the development of one's inner life, and with it a shift in one's relation to the aging process. The book draws on history, philosophy, psychology, gerontology, and spirituality to deepen and expand our understanding of what it means to grow old in the twenty-first century. Peters shares time-tested contemplative practices such as meditation, active imagination, dream work, and creative writing designed to enhance one's inner worlds and enable us to face life's inevitable changes with equanimity and insight. She offers practical advice on issues such as assisted living and home care, and a refreshingly new perspective on matters of memory and cognitive change.
This program is read by the author. Award-winning author and critic Emily Raboteau uses the lens of motherhood to craft a powerfully moving meditation on race, climate, environmental justice—and what it takes to find shelter. Lessons for Survival is a probing series of pilgrimages from the perspective of a mother struggling to raise her children to thrive without coming undone in an era of turbulent intersecting crises. With camera in hand, Raboteau goes in search of birds, fluttering in the air or painted on buildings, and ways her children may safely play in city parks while avoiding pollution, pandemics, and the police. She ventures abroad to learn from indigenous peoples, and in her own family and community discovers the most intimate meanings of resilience. Raboteau bears witness to the inner life of Black women/motherhood, and to the brutalities and possibilities of cities, while celebrating the beauty and fragility of nature. This innovative work of reportage and autobiography will appeal to readers of the bestseller All We Can Save and Joan Didion's The White Album alike. Lessons for Survival stitches together multiple stories of protection, offering a profound sense of hope. A Macmillan Audio production from Henry Holt & Company.
A searing memoir that explores the institutions that defined a Puerto Rican woman and what she unlearned to rediscover herself • "A lushly written, deeply felt investigation into the meanings of home, lineage and selfhood." —Melissa Febos, bestselling author of Body Work and Girlhood Growing up in the Midwest, raised by a Puerto Rican mother who was abandoned by her family, Jamie Figueroa and her sisters were estranged from their culture, consumed by the whiteness that surrounded them. In Mother Island, Figueroa traces her search for identity as shaped by and against a mother who settled into the safety of assimilation. In lyrical, blistering prose, Figueroa recalls a childhood in Ohio in which she was relegated to the background of her mother’s string of failed marriages; her own marriage in her early twenties to a man twice her age; how her work as a licensed massage therapist helped her heal her body trauma; and how becoming a mother has reshaped her relationship to her family and herself. Only as an adult in New Mexico was Figueroa able to forge her own path, using writing to recast her origin story. In a journey that takes her to Puerto Rico and back, Figueroa looks to her ancestors to reimagine her relationship to the past and to her mother’s native island, reaching beyond her own mother into a greater experience of mothering and claiming herself. Drawing from Puerto Rican folklore and mythology, a literary lineage of women writers of color, and narratives of identity, Figueroa presents a cultural coming-of-age story. Candid and raw, Mother Island gets to the heart of the question: Who do we become when we are no longer trying to be someone else?.
My Disappearing Mother: A Memoir of Magic and Loss is far more than a memoir on the devastation that comes with dementia, a cognitive impairment that affects fifty-five million people worldwide. Finnamore beautifully chronicles her mother's rich and varied life journey, from her birth in Puerto Rico during the height of the Depression to ferrying to the United States, in hopes of a better life. On U.S. soil, her mother, Bunny, started working as a performer for enlisted men, then became a secretary, and eventually a professional clairvoyant. With unexpected humor, Suzanne explores the feeling of love, grief, family, and loss while celebrating the bonds between mothers and daughters. In Suzanne's words, "I want a book that attests to the fact that in a world full of disease, there is an abiding and supernatural force of love. That because of this, the sadness and the horror can be borne. That laughter can live alongside grief. That it must." When Suzanne's guest essay "Dementia Is a Place Where My Mother Lives. It Is Not Who She Is" was published in the New York Times on Mother's Day 2022, readers responded with an outpouring of empathy and love. And so this book was born, full of clues and guidance to help others feel less alone on the path that Finnamore has walked.
Do you and your partner fight all the time? Do you love each other, but simply drive one another other up a wall? Do you worry that you'll eventually burn out from all the conflict, arguments, and hurt feelings, and that your relationship will deteriorate? If you're seeking ways to increase love and intimacy and decrease reactionary behaviors like criticism, blaming, withdrawing, and defending, this book can guide you toward a place of harmony and understanding. Based in the revolutionary science of attachment theory and evidence-based emotionally focused therapy (EFT), this is an effective, research-based road map for helping high-conflict couples break free from painful and destructive habits. With this book, you'll uncover the root cause of your conflicts-both as individuals and as a couple. You'll also find simple strategies for creating an emotionally secure environment, as well as tips for managing triggers, de-escalating arguments, and cultivating a real and lasting connection. Feeling emotionally safe and secure in our relationships is a primal need, and it is integral for our health and well-being. If you're ready to transform conflict and chaos into unshakable closeness, this book will guide you, every step of the way.
Parenting strategies grounded in polyvagal theory to help you stay connected with your teen, reduce conflict, and set limits. When it comes to your teen, do you feel like you're walking on eggshells? Do they lash out at you when you try to set limits, or stomp off to their room and slam the door at the slightest criticism? Welcome to the teen years! Emotions and hormones are running high, everything feels like a crisis, and you're lucky if you can get through the day without a fight. So, how can you stay connected, set limits, and keep the peace? Grounded in cutting-edge polyvagal theory, Staying Connected with Your Teen shines a light on why teens are so easily triggered, and offers nerve-calming strategies to minimize reactivity, nurture a stronger connection, and help you lovingly guide your teen on the path to adulthood. You'll also find skills to help you meet your teen where they are developmentally, and discover ways you can help them feel safe and loved-even when you are having disagreements. Trust is at the heart of the bond between parents and teens. This book will help you strengthen that trust and create a peaceful atmosphere where expectations are better communicated.
"Authentic, Practical Advice for the Biggest Struggles You Face There's never been a more complex and confusing time to navigate adulthood than right now, but what if it didn't have to be confusing for you? It's possible to live the happy and healthy life that God has for you, and this step-by-step guide helps you get there. In her debut book, Christian YouTuber, podcaster, and Bible teacher Jeanine Amapola shows you how. Jeanine shares stories she's never shared before about her journey to find freedom from her secret struggles, poor choices, and toxic relationships. Tackling everything from dating and friendship to body image, faith, and career choices, Jeanine offers authentic, biblical advice to help you · make wise decisions to set you up for success in every aspect of life · learn better habits to become more disciplined and healthier · break free from your struggles and hang-ups · challenge yourself mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually to become all God has called you to be Living happy and healthy isn't complicated. You, too, can overcome any challenge you face—and live the full, fruitful, and free life you were created for. ""Jeanine is a bright light in her generation who brings insight and truth in this stunning debut. It's the book I wish I had when I was starting out. Gift this book to all the young women in your life.""—LYSA TERKEURST, #1 New York Times bestselling author and president of Proverbs 31 Ministries"
Louise gets a frantic call to take in a damaged and destructive young girl. Separated from her siblings, Sparkle is hostile and angry. A short while after settling in, Sparkle begins to identify as pansexual. A revolution is underway in the Allen household, with Sparkle's transition motivating all of the young people to explore what becoming an adult means for them. But it's Sparkle's escalating behaviour that causes concern. Discovering a dark fact about Sparkle's birth and the shocking events that the children in her house were part of, Louise is desperate for more help – and not just for the child in her care. As Sparkle's erratic and violent behaviour increases, Louise finds herself and her homelife under serious threat.
The bestselling author of Alienated America traveled the country asking families and experts the same two questions: Why is parenting so hard now? And why are the results so bad? Our culture tells parents there's one best way to raise kids: enroll them in a dozen activities, protect them from trauma, and get them into the most expensive college you can. If you can't do that, don't bother. How is that going? Record rates of anxiety, depression, medication, debts, loneliness and more. In Family Unfriendly, bestselling author and Washington Examiner columnist Timothy P. Carney says it's time to end this failed experiment in overparenting. Have more kids, have more fun, cancel the travel soccer games, let your kids wander off, and give them deeper sources of meaning than material success. This is an old-fashioned view, but every day the evidence validates it. Drawing on rigorous research—both as a reporter and as a dad of six—Carney demonstrates why modern parenting is so misguided. The high standards set for modern American parenting are unrealistic and setting parents—and our kids—up to fail. Researched over three years and written in between rec baseball games and church picnics where nobody was watching the kids, Family Unfriendly is deeply wise, energetically told, and destined to be the most consequential book about parenting in years.